It is customary to fight over who gets to wear the feather boa to prepare dinner. (She cheated)
The puppy waits patiently for those turkey bits to fall on the floor...
The kitty takes over the puppies bed, since it is warm and snuggly...
Then everything becomes a party!!! We got a little wild and racy as usual, so to protect the delicate nature of our visitors, I shall keep the details to myself. FYI - a super sexy, super famous Blogger was here and played with Munchkin and the Princess gang!!!
Another custom is to get up early the next day, and take on the hair of the dog that bit you! So off we went to wine tastings!! This is the beginning photo because the ending photo was not so gracious to any of us accept the designated drivers!!!!
Today, after a long recovery period, SSG came over and picked me up with another Super-Sexy, Super Famous Blogger to go see a movie. (I was sworn to keep the second Super-Sexy, Super Famous Blogger a secret because during the entire movie, I just know she was think of my back side!!! She came out of the movie using words like "Thrust" and "Catapulted"!! I swear, it is true). Anyway, the Ladies made the movie experience quite fun, and no-one recognized them, so we were all safe (even though I had on my Wonder Woman tights just in case). To top off an afternoon of entertainment, with popcorn and a variety of candy, one of the Ladies gave me a big hug and squeezed by butt! Yeah, it was HOT!!!! (and yes, it was good for me. I had to have a cigarette and everything!!!)
So, Grandpa is a hell of a man. He lights up a room when he enters it. He has made it common practice to use humor to lighten any situation. So, whether you are offended or not, here are some of his lines.....(again, his humor is meant to lighten the mood, not point fingers at anyone)....
Grandpa said "Hey Predo, you know how to tell when you are getting old?" Of course, I have to take the bait "No Grandpa, how can you tell?" And so he tells me "Well, first of all, the best part of sex after 60 is snapping off the condom, just to see what you did! Second, when you sit down to use the bathroom, you can test the water temp with you nuts! Third, your penis, which used to stand up and watch you shave, just lays there to watch you tie your shoes!"
"You know, it's a good thing I married your Grandma when she was a virgin, because for 62 years, she thought I was hung! Had she seen anyone else, she would know I am only hung when compared to a squirrel!"
"When a woman makes just the right sound in bed, you know you are doing everything right! Of course, I have no idea what that sound is, but I have heard that it exists!"
"If you tap your penis more then three times after urinating, then you are just playing with yourself!"
"I had a blow job once. You Grandmother blew and blew, and after about a half hour, my dick had windburn so we gave up and had a sandwich instead!"
"You ever wonder why your poop is tapered on the end? So that your butt doesn't slam shut!"
"They say that men run the world, but if women run the bedroom and the check book, who is kidding who?
"Women create life. Men create crap."
"I don't understand the world of technology. Everyone is spending all this time and money to improve everything to high definition or whatever. They spend all this time to make the world look like it already does, but all they have to do is step outside to see it."
So, like Grandpa says, step outside and see the world.....
Thank you all for your support, your comments and your emails. I appreciate all of your kindness, and I am doing better now. I am taking this evening to call family and get my head in line. Maybe tomorrow will return us to our regularly scheduled program (Lord knows I am almost ready to laugh again)...
Again, thank you so much, you are all so wonderful.....
She was the second strongest woman I ever knew. The first, was her daughter P. Now Grandma is gone, and the woman who lead our family fights no more. She held strong for so many days, but inevitably passed this morning.
I can not express my emotion in a single blog, or defining moment. I am not that gifted, I can only flash through time to explain the circumstances.
Grandma and Grandpa have loved each other for 62 years. Grandpa worked nights for 30 years, still ran a farm, and together they raised 6 children, not including me! Grandma and Grandpa have my complete respect and make me proud to carry the family name. They are the ones who taught me to be a man. They are also the ones that kept me from slicing open my fathers throat when he was passed out from drinking, or from slicing my own to escape him when he was awake. They gave me the gift of life.
L, J, D, R, M, and P are the six children.
L - my father. L found his own unique way of parenting. I learned because he "Beat it into" me. What I learned was to hide the bruises, swallow the blood, live with the pain and remember one day I would be big enough to kill him. Enough said there, but let it be known, D his wife, bore witness to all of this, yet she did not care.
J - my aunt. J introduced me to animals. She should me they could be my friends no matter what. I could talk to them, not be judged by them, be free in heart and soul like them. J gave me the gift of trust.
D - my uncle. D showed me what a true family was. He and his wife have been married over 30 years now. They were what I construed as a normal family. D gave me the gift of hope.
R - my uncle. R showed me that I could see a man for all that he was, and learn from the best parts. He also showed me that I could be more then a servant. He showed me how to learn from the mistakes of others to improve myself. R gave me the gift of value.
M and P - my uncle and aunt (respectively). M & P were both quite young, and they will never admit anything, but they gave me freedom, and silence, and food. They showed me that fear and worry do not resolve anything, they are simply emotions. They gave me a window of time that allowed me to be a kid, and learn the lessons my father would never teach me. I could go on a great deal about the many, many gifts they gave me, but it would best be summarized by faith. Faith in myself, faith in the future, faith in humanity, (you get the idea)
So, these individuals, on my behalf, have all been sacrificing since the day of my birth, all because of the actions of my parents.
I had not been "home" for 20 years because of my parents. If I see either of them again, they will not survive my wrath, so I chose to run away. I now have a problem. I met my cousins, some of the grandchildren that I am a part of. They are younger then me, but I see hope in them. I see understanding. I see changes in acceptance. I see the future I did not think I had.
So, you see why I can not put a quick sentence to how I feel. What I do know is that I have a struggle ahead of me, but am going to keep my ears to the pulse of my family. Anything is possible, right Grandma?
Thank you Grandma, your life was beautiful, meaningful, and well spent. I love you.
Sorry everyone, I am going to be out for a few days. My Grandmother (who raised me) has been given 24 to 48 hours to live. I have not been back to the midwest for 20 years and am flying out tomorrow to meet the hundreds of sets of eyes whom I ran away from to say goodbye to her.
So as requested by some of you, here is a snapshot of my most recent bath time playlist! It's a lot to put here, but some of you asked for it. I warn you, my tastes are eclectic. Hope you like it!!!
PS - If you are going to start your own playlist and keep adding to it from my posts, I only ask you call it "Predo's Hot Ass Mix" referring of course to my backside and not the music itself!!!
Dropped full cup of coffee on counter, next to the sink, not in it
Economic environment making the future look hopeless
Not a single positive response to any of my efforts
Not a single Gin and Tonic in sight
Worked through lunch as a favor for a client, who was laid off by the time I finished
Sneezed while standing up and smacked my head on my shelf
Still no Gin and Tonic
5 months of negotiations on contract put on hold and possibly dead
Blah, blah, blah
I wanted nothing more then to just get home and hide from the world. I hit every light red, was surrounded by cars obviously driven by idiots and then got stuck behind a school bus of football players - stopping at every driveway!
I finally made it home, shut off the engine, walked through the garage and up the stairs.
Oscar met me, wriggling from excitement from head to toe, just to see me. At the top of the stairs I sat down on the floor and just squeezed him. Then Vera walked over and gave me a little kitty head butt, schmoozed her face all over me and rolled over for a belly rub. After rubbing her belly for a moment I stood up to receive a hug and kiss from Jimmy. Everything is now perfect!
I am going to top it all off with a nice long bath. Oscar will come in and give me a lick to check on me, Vera will sit on the edge of the tub watching as if to say "OH MY GOODNESS, THAT WATER IS ALL AROUND YOU!!! SAVE YOURSELF" and Jimmy will bring me a nice tall Gin and Tonic and another kiss.
No matter what the day is like, I come home and it is the greatest day I ever had! Nothing, and I do mean Nothing, makes a day like Love does!
Whatever your day was like, look around you at the people who make it worth while, and tell them you love them, everyday!
Thank you all for your blogs, and your comments. I love our time together and the freedom we have in it! I love you all! Off to the tub now, and SSG, stop thinking about my butt!
I can not begin to tell you the affect that The Beatles played on my life. From my birth all the way to present day, they have been in the soundtrack of my life. I think they are respected world wide for their music, and the statements that it holds. They are timeless.
I can not place any one specific album on this post as my number one choice, as each has it's special place in my heart. I truly love them all.
We are down to two of the members, which is quite sad, but we do have the legacy of their recordings to remember them by. The biggest shock to me was on December 8th, 1980 when John was shot. I will never forget that night. I was laying on the floor in the living room watching TV and the news broke through. I was only 10, but I knew what this meant, it meant the absolute end of the Beatles era. That day will never change in my mind.
We had lots of visitors this week-end, coming and going (and I came home smelling like Fisher - SSG's little bundle of energy!). So Oscar was living it up! Of course, Oscar loves him some attention, but Saturday night he was on the verge of passing out from lack of sleep. He was up all day, and then most of the night. This is very out of the norm for him, but he did not want to miss a thing! So like any little boy, he fought the good fight. He did all he could to ward off the sand man!!!
With Daddy right next to him on the chair, he finally caved in. After I took this picture, Jimmy lifted Oscar up and placed him more comfortably on the chair. He got up a few moments later and went to his bed. He did not wake up for his morning "constitutional" until after 8am Sunday Morning!!!!
August 1st, 1981 MTV went on the air. I had to go out of town to see it, since where I was growing up it was construed as Satan's work! I went to my Aunts apartment to watch cable television and began a new chapter in my life. My Aunt and her Brother, My Uncle decided it would be best for me if they had me visit them on week-ends and summers to get away from my parents. This was a saving grace for me, and was one of the most defining moments in time I can remember. This was an era whose soundtrack was filled with the sounds of ........
Soft-Cell and that brain warping "Tainted Love"...
Or how about Rick Springfield (when he wasn't being a soap opera star) who sang us "Jesses Girl" and "I've done everything for you"....
Or, Men Without Hats and that tongue twister...."Safety Dance"
Ah to flash back......
I have some tasty morsels for you below. Now don't get all crazy and break out the leg warmers or anything, oh, and step away from the perm, just step away.....
So, today I start with my top 100! I won't be setting them up in any specific order, or ranking them like a billboard list, but this will provide snip-its of my life. Each of these albums has made such an impact on my life, or at least connected to a specific timeframe, that I can not put one as more valued then another....So before I bore you to tears, I should get started.....
From Tori Amos, to The Bingo Boys and Candy Flip? I mean who is kidding? These three definitely do not fit the same playlist, right? Wrong....
I had just come back from overseas, been involved with Desert Shield/Desert Storm, and hit the USA without the ability to legally drink! Ack! Any-who - You can guess that with the life I had been living this was a little hard to swallow! I had some issues relating to people my own age (of course) but inevitably found the three greatest friends I could have had at the time! P, R, and L! P was infatuated with Madonna, R with Janet Jackson and L with any woman on the face of the planet! We went to Seattle EVERY CHANCE WE GOT!! (This is where I slyly tie in The Bingo Boys and Candy Flip!) You see, the four of us worked out dance routines to these albums (remember the very early 90's???). So we would practice these routines until flawless, more "Ice-Ice Baby" then Grunge of course, but we got a lot of attention for our efforts! R was the choreographer, I was the DJ, and L and P were back-up with the hopes it would get them laid! We would go to an underage club called "The Oz" and shake our asses til the wee morning hours. I have to admit, we were damn good (well, we did put in a lot of sweat equity for it). We kind of got a following, and enjoyed the attention. I was the flashiest, with the hard, more acrobatic moves, while R was very smooth, jazzy like. P and L just followed the pace, and hung around to pick up the chicks that R and I let down......(wonder why!!!)
Anyway, these albums have no real content to them for me, but they make me remember the most amazing time - I call it "My Band Stand days"....oh, the tawdry tales I could tell about P and L! (Crabs, the clap, and the big mean vegetarian biker chick!!!)
Then there was Tori. Ah, she broke into my life like a herd of elephants! It was a Saturday, raining heavy outside, and I was in the TV room with a bunch of my GI friends. VH1 was on, and they introduced a new artist for the first time. Tori Amos popped up with her first video, Little Earthquakes. After the song was over, I turned to my friends and said "This girl is going to be HUGE!!!" They looked at me and laughed, idiots!! So I waited for this album to come out, bought it, and have memorized every flavorful morsel. This is one of those albums that every song is exceptional, the entire album is like taking a ride through your own emotional state. This album is a must have, for sure. If you do not have it right now, you must do everything you can to get it! I swear you will not be disappointed! Bath time is FABULOUS with this album!!!
At work we are "adopting" a family in need for the Holiday season, and they are soooo cute. My heart broke! I can't go into detail, but these little kids asked for PJ's and basic clothes. They did not ask for anything really fun! Tonight I am crunching the budget to see what I can do to make this a great year for them! (maybe mp3 players I am thinking- little kids ones!)
Also, we are doing a Humane Society drive for the animals in need as well. The lists are up, and gifts are coming in!
There is so much need in the world today, but it is so easy to help! There is so much that can be done. Giving money, necessities, food, even something as simple as giving time can help out!
The thing that almost made me cry today? In the big box for Humane Society someone put about 50 tennis balls!!! Tennis Balls!! It did not even dawn on me!! Puppies love to play, and now they can, what a thoughtful gift! Tonight Oscar and Vera (our pets) are going to sit down with us and decide what we are donating!
Have a lovely day!!! (I hope it is as rewarding as mine!)
Anyone who knows me understands my addiction to music. I actually prefer “infatuation with”, but will accept any description used. I don’t know why, but I have always had an ear for music. In fact, I can use music as a roadmap of my life. Well, to highlight milestones might be a better way to put it. Regardless, I think it is always a good idea to awaken the moments of yester-year while remembering a good song or album! Soooooo, what I have been thinking, is to open up my vast collection of CD’s, tapes, and yes, even that stack of LP’s hanging out downstairs and explaining what they mean to me. I think I will only do my top 100 to keep it manageable, but maybe throw in an honorable mention from time to time. So, today we get started with a sample of what I am talking about….
The first LP I ever owned (by myself and not shared with my brother) was given to me on my 12th birthday from my Uncle “M”. It was “MEN AT WORK, BUSINESS AS USUAL”. I loved this album, and played it over and over and over and over. At the time, and unfortunately for anyone within a mile of our house, my parents were living together (a situation that went back and forth almost weekly – move in – move out – move in – move out!!!). Anyway, my parents had routine knock down drag out fights that were renowned in my neighborhood. So, My Aunt “P” got me a set of headphones and my Uncle “M” got me my first very own LP! I quickly found that I could put the record on and run the headphone cord under the closet door. This gave me hideaway to listen to songs like “Who Can It Be Now?’, “Down Under” and “I Can See It In Your Eyes”. The entire album has been engrained in my memory banks, in fact too date I still know all the words! Of course I still used my bulky table top tape recorder to record songs off the radio, but LP's sounded so much better!!!! Ah, yesterday when I was young.......
I am not ranking this album in my top 100, as it is pretty much the beginning of it all.
Other events occurring at this time were:
Epcot, the second largest theme park at the time was almost completed!
Sony was working on the first compact disc player!
Falkland War
Cal Ripken starts what will eventually become his record-breaking consecutive games played streak of 2,632!
The first "Rubik's Cube" World Championship
The Equal Rights Amendment falls short of the 38 states needed to pass (equal rights based on sex)!
Billy Joel seriously injured in mototcycle accident in Long Island
Madonna signed a record deal and was working on her first album “Madonna”!
Michael Jackson's Thriller will release and go on to sell 20 million copies....
Ozzy bites the head off a live bat thrown at him at a concert!
Princess Grace of Monaco dies when her car hurtles off a cliff.
John Belushi Dies
Liposuction is introduced
Vietnam Memorial is erected
Eye of the Tiger was the number one song for the entire month of August, only to be bumped out in September by “Abracadabra” (Steve Miller Band) and then “Hard to say I’m Sorry” (by Chicago). “Jack and Diane” (John Cougar) took over for October!
Top grossing songs of 1982:
Eye of the Tiger (Survivor)
Down Under (Men at Work)
I Love Rock and Roll (Joan Jett & The Blackhearts)
This is Jimmy, my partner, and our furry little boy, Oscar.
We also have a furry little princess named Vera.
I have a unique family, I know, but this family chose to love me for who I am, and nothing more. Pretty simple right? Kind of, you see, I waited for the right guy to come along, and I was willing to wait a long time. Then there was Jimmy!
He is the sweetest, most loving, wonderful man in the world. We are almost complete opposites, but I think that is why it works. Anyway, I knew he was what I had been waiting for, and down the yellow brick road we went!
Now, more then 17 years later, we are still the same. There isn't anyone more important to me then my family. Jimmy has more value in my heart then life itself. I can not imagine ever being without him. My close friends and family just know how we are, and that it is forever, but strangers or new acquaintances always ask how we do it. Well, we aren’t “doing it”, it is not a chore or a job, it just is. Having said that, we do have a routine that might help others understand:
Say “I love you” every morning, at the end of every phone call, before leaving, before bed time and anytime you feel you want to. You don’t know what will happen in an hour, make sure your partner knows how you feel, everyday.
Don’t try to change, either yourself or your partner. If you love them as they are, you have enough.
Treat your partner better then you would treat yourself.
Every once in a while give a little gift of thoughtfulness. For example, a post it note that say’s “coupon for one kiss” or their favorite candy bar. Maybe flowers, or even a single flower. Maybe even write their name on your chest over your heart. Just something to show that you think about them when they are not around.
Spend time with them that is not a chore, also, spend time away from them that is not a chore.
Make plans together.
Touch, kiss, cuddle and hold hands outside the bedroom.
Tell them how beautiful and sexy they are. Describe why.
Watch them undress, get dressed, or shower once in a while, just for fun.
Know their minds, their bodies, and their habits. Know them, understand them.
Be excited to go home. Nothing makes my day better then going home to see Jimmy and the pets.
Hug at least twice a day.
Thank them, for everything they do. Let them know you appreciate the effort it takes to love you!
Don’t judge.
There is so much more, and I could go on and on, but this blog is not long enough.
Like I said earlier, our friends (and anyone else who is around us for all of five minutes) can see how we operate. We live by the thought of treating others like you would want to be treated. For example, we think that everyone in our home deserves comfort, love, hugs, kisses, cocktails and a pet to play on the floor with!!
Mondays are bad enough with out the news breaking my spirit. So today, 3 people shot outside night club, woman arrested for leaving her 10 month old baby completely alone so she could go out drinking for six hours, Meth found in a boys Halloween candy, and they caught the Casanova Con Man whom has been conning elderly woman out of their savings. After all that, they recap with a flash backs to last weeks story about a girl whose parents forgot to pay for her lunch at school so they took away her lunch and gave a P, B and J sandwich instead (granted, the football team probably doesn't go without anything!!!). WTF! It is official, people are completely insane!
Yesterday at the store, a lady in a Forrester, backed out of her parking spot without even looking. She was chatting it up on her cell phone, and almost ran over a man with a walker. She drove away without even knowing. I mean, HELLO, THERE ARE OTHER PEOPLE ON THIS PLANET!!!!!
We are still riding the wave of change on the world front with the election of a minority to office, yet almost every other civil rights bill failed in america. What? I mean, not to deflate the moment, but I just feel that people are constipating my conscience. So, having said that, I have a request for you. Make it a point to look at everyday as a chance to improve. Today, please post a comment about something good that happened in the world today, no matter how small. I could use a little good news today (to steal a line from a country song!)
I shall start:
Solverton OR elected the first transgender mayor. The votes were 1,988 to 1,512. Mayor elect Stu Rasmussen, 60, has not kept anything a secret. In fact, he made his information completely available so that the election could be dominated by policy and position regarding the actual mayoral post. Think about it, a vote for the actual post! This is good news!
I have a new theme! It was not easy, but I used my limited experience to do the best I could. I think I did pretty well and am quite happy with the new layout. For those of you wondering, it came from Themlib.
Now that we are all enlightened by my internet abilities, I want to thank you for holding my hand for a little while! You all have such wonderful blogs, and are so comfortable within them, that I was given a great start to mine. Of course, I will continue to learn from you, and call on your skills from time to time, but just had to let you know how grateful I am for you. So, Thank You all and especially SSG (whose patience and understanding are just fabuloussssss!)
So, tomorrow I begin to focus on my own blog items, and hope they become a little more personal and entertaining (like all of yours)! Granted, I guess Fridays blog met both of those requirements by slapping a big ol' shot of my butt on the top! Regardless of the changes, I will be sure to retain the gratuitous firemen photo once in a while for sure!
So, I am one of the early birds at the office. There are usually two other people that get in early as well. So I turn up the ipod sometimes, and we delve deep into our work.
Unfortunately, this morning was a little different! As I sat at my desk working on an issue one of my clients was having, it happened!
Ipod – “If I could save time in a bottle, The first thing that I’d like to do…” by Jim Croce
My mind was thinking about a client issue – “Little Suzy is on her bicycle traveling at 6 mph in the direction of the park. The Ice Cream man is in his truck, traveling at 4 mph in the direction of Little Suzy. How long will it take Suzy to reach the Ice Cream man in order to get her Double Crunch Fudgy Sycle?” Pencil scribbling numbers, symbols and arrows all over three sheets of paper!!!!!
Ipod – “Oh, my, god, Becky, look at her butt! It is so big. She looks like, one of those rap guys’ girlfriends” – by Sir Mix-a-Lot
Co-worker #1 – "Oh my god Predo, turn that shiznet up!"
Co-worker #2 – laughing hysterically, snorts not once but twice
Predo fulfills his obligation by turning the volume to ridiculously loud!
It started out as a simple sway, then a little bump to the beat, then it was full force QUEENY DANCING!! My hands in the air, ass snapping too and fro, a little bend, a little twist, even a full 360 spin! It was like Cameron Diaz from Charlie’s Angels. I even threw in a moon-walk, ON CARPET EVEN!!!
Ipod – “So, fellas! (Yeah!) Fellas! (Yeah!) Has your girlfriend got the butt? (Hell yeah!) Tell 'em to shake it! (Shake it!) Shake it! (Shake it!) Shake that healthy butt!Baby got back!”
My hips now gyrating at hurricane speed, my hands up, and my elbows out, it was like I had been training for this moment my whole life!! Yes, Yes!! “Ladies and Gentlemen, the winner of the 2008 Olympic Gold Metal for re-enacting a Soul Train Moment – Predo!!!” The crowd goes wild! This is Anarchy!
I now have one leg up on the edge of the desk, grinding and thrusting like a pole dancer in Vegas. Hands behind my head, leaning backwards and reliving every possible move I had seen in dirty dancing! Bobby Brown step aside! Wah-Dah-Tay is throwing down, Beeee-atch!!!
Ipod – (silence)
Ass now deflated and wondering what just happened.
Co-worker #1 – “Awwwww, now I am sad”
Co-worker #2 – “Play it again!”
And as if to save us from the depression of our loss.....
Ipod – “I’m too sexy for my shirt, too sexy for my shirt, So sexy it hurts, and I’m too sexy for Milan, too sexy for Milan, New York and Japan” – by Right Said Fred
The Bootay Snaps to attention, and leaps back to Gyrating, this time in the reverse direction!
Co-worker #2 – “Whoop-Whoop”
Co-worker #1 – “I love Fridays!!”
After the song ended, Co-workers #1 and #2 agreed to never speak of this moment again. I myself made no such commitment!!!
This morning I was walking Oscar before day-care. Two people were walking behind me on their way to the bus stop and a fire-truck drove buy (no sirens or lights). The following conversation took place while I did my best not to laugh.
Girl- "Oh, FIREMEN!"
Boy- "Jeeze, what is the deal? I mean aside from the stupid uniform, what have you got?"
Girl- "They multitask!"
Boy- "What?" (with obvious distain)
Girl- "They multitask. Not only to they take GREAT care of themselves, they take care of others. Like saving lives and stuff!"
Boy - "How the heck is that multitasking?"
Girl - "Okay, so they are putting out fires, providing first aide, monitoring everyone else's safety, and at the same time they are listening. They listen, understand and react!"
Boy -"I could do that!"
Girl - " While watching Football?"
Boy - "Well....."
Girl -"Well what? It is what every Girl Wants! A man who can take care of us, listen when we are speaking, even while other things are happening and actually understand what we said! It's better then sex, but the uniform helps out there too!"
Boy - "Argh"
Girl - "What?"
Boy - (silence, then) "Nothing!"
Girl - "What?"
Boy - "I just don't don't like to belittle!"
Girl - "Well I can't help you with that problem, but if you learn how to tie a cherry stem in a knot you might still get a date!"
When I lived in Germany (West Germany at the time), Zell was one of my favorite places. They made wine, I drank wine. They had great atmosphere, I like great atmosphere. They were beautiful, I have a nice bootayyyy!!!
Anyway there is a story on why the wine makers all got together. This area's wine is the only one allowed the black cat on the label. They are referred to as Zeller Schwarze Katz or Zell Black Cat.
The story goes that when wine merchants were travelling in Zell, after an extensive wine-tasting, the final choice was between three barrels, but they couldn’t decide which was best. The vintner’s wife came into the cellar, accompanied by a black cat. Suddenly the cat jumped onto one of the barrels and hissed at anyone who tried to approach. The wine merchants quickly agreed that the barrel they would buy was the one the black cat was defending so obstinately. Shortly thereafter, the same wine merchants returned and bought all the wine from the vineyards that had supplied the grapes for that barrel, because it had sold so well. The wine-growing area became known as the Zeller Schwarze Katz.
First and foremost, schedule some time for yourself and make it a routine!
Make sure that the phone is shut off or unplugged, and that no children or guests enter into your private time. (If married or involved, I suggest you make it very clear that during this time your spouse/significant other understands their responsibilities in this matter!)
Open a nice bottle of wine, grab a nice glass, and set both on the floor next to the tub (you probably won’t drink the whole bottle, but it is there if you need more in your glass!)
Bring in music. I personally have an iPod player, and a specific playlist for a particular mood. Play something without a significant beat, preferably something with a Spa like atmosphere.
Stop the drain, poor bubble bath, and start the water filling (of course at a safe and comfortable temperature as you can always warm it up again in a while)
Set out and light a single candle. More then one is too much. Besides, the light from one candle dances to music and the mood. I set this on the floor (since my floor is tiled) and let the light make shadows on the wall and ceiling.
Stop the water when filled and foamy. Place a big fluffy bathrobe for use after bathing, then undress.
Tell yourself how beautiful you are! You have this wondrous and amazing body, you should be proud of it! Tell yourself that you are a spectacular being, because you definitely are!
Enter the tub slowly, feet first. Feel the stress and frustration of life wash instantly away!
Reach over the edge of the tub, pour a glass of wine, and begin to relax.
Do not think of the world outside the tub. Let your mind wonder, let your body feel it’s parts in the warm relaxing water. Let yourself be overtaken in complete comfort.
Fill wine glass as needed, add warm water as needed, and enjoy.
(make sure you drink water before and after your time in the tub, we don’t want to be dehydrated now do we!)
Once completed with bath, do a quick rinse in the shower, towel dry, put on robe and go to the kitchen with the wine. Place remaining wine in fridge, fill a large water glass with ice and water. Go to the bedroom, place the water next to the bed, turn off anything that makes light or noise, and crawl under the covers.
Now relax even more deeply, and fall asleep. Dream about the incredible person that you are and will continue to be, then dream about me naked!
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